Common Thought of Sir Rantsalot

Oliver Stone’s down right crazy. Natural Born Killers gives me a headache each time I watch it just because the plot is everywhere, a lot’s going on and it’s really out there. Platoon was excellent, I liked it how he got to the nitty-gritty of Vietnam. Any Given Sunday was like a gigantic football commercial. The Doors didn’t cover what I’d expected from Jim Morrison. His film of the World Trade Center came way too early. But I gotta say, the film W. was a pretty ballzy move especially since it didn’t get much publicity.

This film starts off with a bang, there’s no back story and goes full force with the assumptions that you know what’s going on at the start. It starts off with our president having a meeting with every power in the white house discussing WMD’s (weapons of mass destruction) and I won’t throw any spoilers out.

The film jumps around, but it seems necessary for what’s going on; the flashbacks show of W. just being a spoiled rich kid with no direction, and all he wants to do is make “poppy” proud. His desire to be political is still a mystery to me.

This film didn’t really tell us stuff that we didn’t know, it just had a comedic viewpoint of what we thought went on. It really slammed Donald Rumsfeld because the film made it seem like it was entirely his idea to send the troops over to Iraq to bring democracy, and I had no sympathy for that; even if that was what happened.

Like Passion of the Christ, you are immediately supposed to know who’s who. There was hardly any introduction of most of the characters. It was incredibly easy to point out who Condolleeza Rice was… by the tone in her voice. Karl Rove was standing beside W. throughout the movie and was depicted as a jackass guardian angel.

But enough of the political slander, the film in itself had a rugged camera, it was all over the place when something was a scene of importance.

However, it had a bunch of funny moments; for it was meant to be seen as an SNL type of parody. Like I said earlier, this was not exactly a bio-pic but more of a comedic viewpoint as to what we think happened. However there weren’t enough Bushisms throughout the movie, and I think some actual quotes from Bush are downright hilarious.

“Like him or hate him, our current president has a fascinating story of how he started by being a nobody to then being our president and changed what America is.” claims Oliver Stone. I couldn’t agree more.

The economy is crap, we’re fighting for nothing in Iraq, we have a new American holiday, gas prices have sky-rocketed, we are the most hated country in the world, and we are more paranoid thanks to him. I don’t really like him for that. I’m pretty sure  our founding fathers (especially George Washington)  are rolling in their graves knowing of what he’s done to this great country.

But enough of that, I saved a special part here for a couple potshots at Josh Brolin. He did a marvelous job of displaying our president, he got the accent and the look down to a t. But on SNL, when he was making an appearance as a guest host, he slammed Bush verbally. I’m not supporting Bush in anyway but, to research someone fully and to basically spit in there face is completely unmoral. That’s just not cool.

Diane Lane is a goddess, she is married to Josh Brolin. She was in a lot of my favorite movies (RUMBLE FISH), and she is drop dead gorgeous as well as having a great acting skill. There was a report 4 years ago that Brolin in a drunken rage beat her. I am strongly against that shit, it pisses me off to hear stuff like that.

Why in the world would you hit somebody this pretty?

NO EXCUSES

But all in all: W was good, bravo you wife beating p.o.s.

4.0 out of 5

Catch ya on the flipside

Trye Parker and Matt Stone have solidified themselves in comedy concrete not by just doing South Park, but the films they’re involved with as well. With Team America: World Police, they’ve pulled many a gutsy move as far as statements about certain countries go.

Team America: World Police was done completely by use of puppets, which can be signified only as strange nowadays, now that there’s CGI Animation, special effects and others. The inspiration for use of puppets was brought about by a children’s show called Thunderbirds. If Matt Stone and Trey Parker are present, you can imagine that a lot of rauchy, screwball-esque type comedy is headed your way.

The plot is down right ridiculous, but like I said in one of my previous blogs, “it’s a comedy, it’s supposed to make you laugh.” Terrorists are overrunning the globe, America’s had enough, and a team of specialists are hired to stop it all. Kim Jong-Il is pissed at the world so he wants to make every thing right by bringing chaos to the world. Enter an actor named Gary to sneak information about whats going on with Jong-Il’s master plan.

This movie is still talked about to this day, myself and most of my friends included. Some of the best one-liners you will ever hear, “Durka Durka”, “I’m so Ronery”, “Matt Damon”, “America, F*** YEAH!”… I could go on. There’s tons of swearing, a sex scene, vomiting, gay slurs, and more galore! Bear in mind that these are all done by puppets! The only “real” cameo is done by two black cats who claim to be panthers.

All in all, it’s wacky and it’s smart. Trey Parker actually shipped 5 copies of this movie to Kim Jong-Il himself in hopes that he’d see what kind of person he truely is. For a movie that screams America, but takes a potshot at America as well, this stands out in a sea of crappy movies.

F*** YEAH!

4 out of 5 salutes to Old Glory

Catch ya on the flipside

HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!

What can be said about the Ace Man? He’s made quite a dent in everything media. He’s done voice acting, ranted about his manliness and has kept his own with the likes of being on the radio. Before he did any of that he taught boxing and even stepped into the ring a few times. With all of his success in the media, it was time he showed the world how well he could write a movie… and act in it as well. The popularity of this film was nothing too special though, it was in independent theaters for a few weeks, and then 1 or 2 months later, it’s on video.

Jerry is a down on his luck construction worker who’s about to hit the big 4-0, he’s bored with his job, his girlfriend and pretty much life. On his spare time, he teaches boxing at a local gym. Back in the day, he had boxed and wasn’t on top, but he was a good fighter; a scrawny bag of bones like him would deliver a hell of a punch, therefore, the alias “The Hammer” was given to him. When he gets challenged to step in the ring, he gets observed by a scout from the Olympic U.S. boxing team, he’s then asked to join. But there’s something fishy about wanting a man his age to join a team of highly tuned boxing machines. 

The acting was typical Adam Carolla, smart-assery all the way. By that I mean, insults left and right, a slight joke here and there, and it kind of made it stand out from all the rest of the movie that was going on. The other characters were down to earth and had nothing special about them, just like actuality. Life isn’t all special effects and miracles, it’s hard to rise to the top, no matter how many times you get drunk. Boxing is and always has been one of my favorite sports. So it was pretty nice to see one of my favorite comedians dish out his skills.

All in all, this film’s for the guys all the way. If you’re looking for something that isn’t quite as epic as Rocky or Cinderella Man, but have the strength to see a film that’s on the level of the average Joe such as Beer League, check it out. 

4.1 out of 5 Knockout Punches

Catch ya on the flipside